So in the span of a few months I had my moms dad die and my dads mom die. I had the honor of being one of the people to carry both of them to their graves. It was a hard thing to do. I loved them both very much and miss them terribly. In the past year or two I did not spend the amount of time I may have liked with them. Moving to another town a few hours away kinda does that I guess.
Grandpa Perkins was a good ol' country boy. Grew up in southern Utah and could actually speak Navajo!!! I only found that out a few years ago! He was the most caring, funny, wonderful person.
Grandma Jensen, who we all referred to as Dodee, always had a smile. Amazing cook and loved to laugh. If you went to her house chances were high that you would end up playing games, doing puzzles, or talking for hours.
There are not enough kind words to say about either one and even still when I think about them I get a little choked up.
During these hard few months I have had a lot of time to think about the passing of those you love. I have heard many times that you'll always regret time not spent with loved ones so spend as much time as you can with them. It is true. I do regret not spending more time with them, getting to know them even better, hearing stories from their pasts. The more I thought about it however, I realized something... it wouldn't have mattered if I had spent every spare moment with them I would still feel that regret. I would still wish I had spent more time with them because I loved them and I knew that they loved me. It doesn't really matter how much time you spend with someone (unless it's really not that much) because if you love them their absence is just hard.
Another thing that has been really hard is seeing my remaining grandparents. It has made my heart hurt so much. They both spent their respective retirements together pretty much 100% of the time. Now that their other half is gone seeing the loneliness in their faces or demeanor has been really difficult. I can't imagine what that would even feel like and it almost makes me cry every time I think about them.
Man the circle of life can be really hard at times. They don't tell you that in the Lion King.
